By engaging in not doing any other activity other than directly and precisely tuning into experiencing what it is we are experiencing in this exact moment, we aren’t engaging in any other activity.
By allotting time everyday to simply not engage in any other activity other than engaging in the activity of experiencing what we are experiencing exactly as we are experiencing, we are also not engaging any other activity.
During the time we are only experiencing ourselves as we are experiencing ourselves, our relationship to the other activities that we are not doing during that allotted time, changes. By not engaging in the activities that we would usually engage in at the time when we are only experiencing ourselves as what it is we are doing, our relationship to whatever else we would be doing changes, because, by experiencing ourselves just as we are experiencing ourselves, we are not putting energy into enabling activity, as behavior, and by not doing so, our relationship to whatever other activity we would be doing changes, because, we gain the opportunity of looking and seeing our habits, tendencies, thoughts, and feelings, and all our mind-stuff that surrounds our connection to whatever else we would usually be doing; and by being with ourselves without acting out towards the identified activity of our usual routine, and by not suppressing our desire to ward off or pretend that we don’t prefer or don’t identify with what we would usually be doing, we can see in the immediacy of the moment that what we are considering to do, other than what we are doing, is only a thought.
We find ourselves thinking about what it is we would be doing instead of simply doing what we are currently doing, which is being with our experience just as it is and not engaging in any other activity. While we experience ourselves experiencing ourselves wanting to do something other than what we are doing now, we learn to deal with not having an immediate moment of actively fulfilling our instant desire, and this causes our relationship to ourselves and to our things to change. It causes our relationship to ourselves and to the things in our lives to change because we recognize in the immediacy of our experience that we are merely thinking about what we would be doing, and while we are not engaging what would desire to do, (what we usually would be doing), we find ourselves thinking about it, and thinking about it is different than actually doing it. Noticing we are thinking about, instead of acting on it, is the basis for our relationship to ourselves and the objects of our lives to transform. We are able to see the difference between being where we presently are, not doing anything other than just being with our own experience, and thinking about something, and thinking about something as different than the thing itself we are thinking about.
1) There is being immediately where we are.
2) There is thinking about something else or being elsewhere.
3) There is that thing or elsewhere that is outside of us, that is only what it is, and not what we actually think about it.
By experiencing the recognition of these differences in our experience as we are experiencing ourselves and not engaging in any other activity during these recognitions, our relationships to ourselves and our external world changes. As we make a daily habit of being with ourselves just as we are for an allotted amount of time, we develop our ability to deal with life, we open ourselves to the opportunity of experiencing unconscious layers of trauma, and we begin to make a transformation in our relationship to ourselves and to the things in our life; all of which is learning to abandon identity attachment.
It’s not identity we are abandoning, it’s our attachment to our identity that we are learning to abandon by experiencing ourselves experience ourselves. Our attachment is for the most part unconscious. It is that, attachment to our identities which is an unconsciousness of ourselves, that reifies itself in the face of our activities and behaviors; and our activities and behaviors, are for the most part, generated from the absence of having not examined, looked at, self-reflected upon the negative space surrounding our lives.
Everything in our lives that we use to fulfill the concept of what it is to have a life, to maintain a sense of fitting-in and remaining within the prescribed norms of our lives, is an attitude based in an attempt to not look at the immediacy of the negative space which surrounds our lives in each and every instant of being alive.
As long as we perpetuate the psychological attitudes of finding relief in behaviors which correspond to fulfilling the concept of what it is to have a life through activities of familiar comfort, our ability to deal with life can’t expand, our distinctions between our experience and our thinking remains blurry, and the things which surround our lives remain in a heightened state of self-value, so much so, it would be impossible in many cases to even imagine what our lives would be like without certain things, routines, or activities.
To learn to abandon our attachments to our identities, is to learn to experience ourselves just as we are experiencing ourselves without needing to do anything else. Our ability to deal with life expands, and we become more satisfied without the need to attach the meaning of ourselves to the immediacy of activities that are not currently in the instant of the moment. Slowly through time, through engagement of daily allotted time to experience ourselves just as we are, our relationship to all things changes, and our attachment to our identity changes.
Sooner or later, like a natural process, we no longer want to dismiss our lives to the noise of routines that fulfill only a concept of self-worth and self-belonging in this world of social-norms, no longer do we want to do activities and engage in behaviors that only reify our psychological attachments to things, cutting us off from possibilities of connecting and openness with ourselves and with others and the things and people of our lives.
More and more as time goes on, as we stick with a routine of daily experiencing ourselves just as we are experiencing ourselves, we find ourselves more and more curious about the possibilities of our own potential free from reifying attachment patterns, habits, and tendencies, and we make room to experience further layers of unconscious psychosomatic conditioned cellular energetic flow and tension attached familiarity for healing and transformation.
We naturally become more hungry for our own transformation, for experiencing the release of tension in the body, we naturally become interested in how we have learned false attitudes and false ways of being, in order to experience a sense of surrender, a sense of relief, and a sense of letting go.
Through slowing down and engaging ourselves in a very direct mode of looking and feeling our experience just as it is as it is occurring, we open ourselves up to the potential for a profound shift in the conditioned flow of energetic patterns in our psychosomatic system. Conditioned cellular response can transform, and its tension attached enabling condition/s can change, and when they do from a deliberation of not acting out into behaviors nor suppressing the desire to fulfill behaviors, but experiencing ourselves for what we are experiencing, cellular functional conditioning alters to accommodate new responses to energy input-output, and when it does, it can release stored tension, and when this occurs we experience this as letting go.
Letting go isn’t something we can do, it’s something that happens to us. Our cellular conditioned reactivities change when we are simply being with ourselves, because the information feed of familiar input-output signals doesn’t become fulfilled in our behavioral engagement. By not engaging ourselves in fulfilling unconscious signals of cellular familiarization, stored tension in the body not only releases, but also the unconscious attachment to identity we had in the fulfillment of bodily triggered activities becomes exhausted, when this occurs we experience letting go.
Finally the collapse of holding onto ourselves. Everything can surrender. We can uncontrollably weep.
We can uncontrollably weep.
Letting go can finally happen. We don’t have to hold onto ourselves anymore, we don’t have to endure and take-on and shove our way through life, we don’t have to pretend and suck-up and bare it all on ourselves and carry ourselves through every circumstance without ever taking a break, we don’t have to beat ourselves up at every turn, tell ourselves negative things, shame ourselves into fitting-in. We do not. Finally letting go can happen, when we slow down and look at the negative space surrounding our lives, and when we do, whether we know it or not, we are abandoning attachment to our identities, and identifying ourselves through the means of abandoning the attachment of ourselves in identifying the value and corresponding behavior: to only experience ourselves as we are experiencing ourselves for the complete duration of the time we’ve set aside to do so.
Our identities have to become attached to the value and the daily engagement of doing nothing as different than doing anything else, for the possibility of all identity attachment to one day become absolutely abandoned. In order for profound transformation to become real in ourselves, we have to, through time, experience within ourselves the value and the need to engage in a daily way of not doing anything other than experiencing ourselves just as we are, and in so doing we make a new unconscious attachment to identity, but this time instead of our unconscious attachment to identity as linked towards reifying its existence, we have to make a new connection to the vitality and importance in not reifying our existence; in order to do that, we have to over time, learn to trick ourselves out of the comforts of what we’d prefer to do, and develop a sense of routine around our daily allotted time of doing nothing other than experiencing ourselves just as we are.
The new daily allotted time is indicative of a shift in the attachment to our identities, and this shift is a new attachment, but this time the contents of attachment isn’t towards fulfilling the functions of our identities, but rather, the contents of attachment are from having clearly identified the value in engaging in such a way, and from having found in our experience, a realized desire to become further free from identity attachment.
Our identities have to realize the vital and immediate importance of experiencing letting go from attachment to our identities, the experiential birth of true aloneness, the basis for profound letting go.