It is true when we slow down and use our human self-reflecting mechanism of cognitive-awareness we are able to see through, penetrate through, the veils of our own suffering, and stored tension in the body, is able to release, and cellular functionality can learn new ways of exchange.
In order to do this, it is necessary to find the value in looking at the negative-space which surrounds our lives, the space no one likes to point to, the space we’ve habitually learned to ignore, paint-over, or simply not give any attention to.
The space that still asks, where’s the movie, the popcorn?
Consumerist society does not value the negative-space of life, the space void of all social significance and cultural reference points. In fact, the negative-space of life is considered fundamentally antagonistic towards consumerist value and ideal.
Consumerist society and mentality is like an unconscious reactivity born from un-developed emotional awareness, as a way of not acknowledging the negative-space surrounding life. Consumerism provides billions of opportunities for distraction.
Distraction from what?
Distraction from experientially facing the empty-space that surrounds all the stuff of our lives. All of our stuff and how we perceive all our stuff, the personally-attached significance, whether consciously or unconsciously, that defines our story, personality, and sense of value.
We will lose all of it at death.
Death happens a lot during war, and violence is a characteristic of war, and the suffering which always emerges from it, in proportion to consumerism, is simply placed aside from the working institutions of society and not integrated into the whole of society’s function.
Which is exactly like how trauma works in the microcosm of the body. Cellular functionality became imprinted with damage and stores tension, and the cells, in their shape with tension are unconsciously attached.
Due to the lack of integration of the energy stored in the cells, the body acts like it has placed aside the traumatic event and carries on just well. Meanwhile, the psychological manifestations of trauma are present and we are consumed in the institutions of reifying our behavior, therefore nothing of is integrated in the whole of our functionality and we continually place aside what we don’t know we are placing aside, until we transform and integrate differently.
If death in general were more directly incorporated into the structure of our lives, we would be living in a different society, and consumerism would have less of a distracting grip on our minds and hearts.
And we’d probably perceive our bodies differently.
Since we are very distracted, so deeply very distracted from not looking at the absence of what we’ve worked so hard to cover up, (how we feel about our bodies), to provide a strong-quality of life for ourselves and our spouses, our children, and immediate circle of friends, we find ourselves consistently needing to be busy and consistently needing to fill space in the event we are bored; and in the event our lives simply feel a bit droopy, which depending on the conditioning of stimulus we’re familiar to receiving, might be quite often, like nearly every few minutes feeling a need for having music, television, and something in our mouths at each instant.
The value in slowing down is to turn toward what is discomforting by using our human self-reflective mechanism to look at, and feel into, what it is like to do nothing.
There is something funny going on, to do nothing, is still doing something, but what? We’re examining what it is to not engage in any formal activity but breathing and experiencing.
And as we do this our capacity to deal with life expands.
And as we do this our cellular body of stored trauma releases and we transform.
If we get into the habit of daily engaging in the activity of abiding with breathing and experiencing as a form of doing nothing in relation to what we usually consider ‘doing something,’ then gradually the harmful limitations of our ability to deal with things snaps open, and our capacity for discomfort expands.
And as our capacity for discomfort expands so do our reactivities. Less, and less there is anything to defend because more and more our limitations for dealing with life transform. And as reactivities diminish, we begin to cultivate a genuine sense for less distraction.
Through the dismantling of our psychological orientation as wired from the implication of stored cellular trauma, we begin to experience a functionality for potential intimacy and connectivity, that at first we feel as somewhat scary and foreign, only because we don’t yet have any skills for how to orient ourselves in these new transformative psychological ways into the world.
However, quickly it can be noticed in our experience that the psychological insights which arrive during the release of physiological stored trauma in cellular functionality are inter-related with a simultaneous sense of understanding things we hadn’t previously understood. And this sense of new understanding, provides with it, a new sense of clarity.
The clarity which emerges from psychological insights as inseparable from the release of physiologically stored trauma in cellular function, is a humbling experience of truly being able to see and identify the causes and conditions for our own perpetuating victim-mentality, taking things personally, and our own blockages against forgiveness, our own walls against life.
All our reactivity: justification, rationalization, competition, one-up-manship, comparing, defensiveness, can simply crumble like as we were wearing layers of metallic armor, and suddenly all that heaviness dismantles.
The clarity which emerges from experiencing the release of stored trauma in cellular functionality and its psychological impact, may not necessarily be joyful to feel, but what it does provide is a sense of relief.
A relief from darkness of our own mystery and why we react the ways we do, from our perpetual state of heaviness. A relief from having to always perpetuate an unconscious lie. A relief from now knowing and seeing the behaviors and loops which have been reifying negative tendencies and magnetizing reinforcing put-down, from people, from our use of objects, and the use of our own bodies against ourselves, against our own wellbeing and against life itself.
A relief from tension attached to cellular functionality and the enslavement of the cell’s imprinted storage and wiring. When the cell releases attached tension, the cell’s functionality flows in a more healthy way, and during such a release, relief can be simply knowing that by experiencing this type of cellular shift, healing is happening.
The kind of relief that comes from experiencing all the ways we’ve been ignoring, over-compensating, reacting against life is very intimate and deeply personal to our own immediate situation, and to our own immediate wellbeing, and to our own immediate sense of skill-sets for helping ourselves. It can feel very exposing, very raw, very upsetting and challenging to our sense of self, to see all the ways we are addicted to covering up our lives, stuffing out sadness, hurting others. But in such exposure, relief comes as finally having a basis for being able to see ourselves in a non-threatening way and to see that we are changing, growing, healing, and that there is great potential for mending, acknowledging, and grief.
When we experience this relief, we also are with the intimacy of our immediate experience, and this kind of intimacy arrives as inseparable from the clarity of seeing the causes and conditions for acting out of, or suppressing, the negative space surrounding our lives. A clarity which occurs through a type of quality of being with ourselves, a type of quality for being alone with ourselves, an aloneness that is deeply and profoundly personal and unique.
This quality of aloneness, is an aloneness, because it is something which is occurring directly in our experiences immediately, now, and it is an aloneness because it is not translatable from experience into words. The experience is the experience only, and the words used are the words used only, but the words are not the experience, to use words is a different experience. The quality of aloneness of being only with our experience exactly as it is, is not necessarily loneliness, loneliness being an emotional indication of unbalanced relationships with people and community in our experience, aloneness, however is totally being with ourselves in an undistracted way and can provide the opportunity for feeling a release of tension stored in cellular function, and the sense of relief which can emerge from that experience.
Aloneness is feeling only directly what is going on in our immediate experience, which is whatever it is that we are immediately feeling, and when we do this, we are no longer fooling ourselves about anything particularly, especially our own intimate experience of what is happening right now.
Aloneness is the basis for profound transformation.